Feb 21, 2010

I'm waiting on lunch, which today is tacos and nachos. I'm watching Still Black: A Portrait of Black Transmen in my living room. I wanted to watch it with friends last night, but Robin Williams was on and we had a case of the Phat Kid and my room needed to be cleaned. As I'm watching this film and transman after transman tells their story, I'm wondering about my own journey.

I've had to tell my story so many times that I've made it linear. I'm not going to go into here, but today is also my 11 months on T, week-wise. On the 26th, calendar-wise, it'll be 11 months. It's been a wild ride. Physically, I think there isn't much left for my medication to handle. As I sit here eating a shrimp taco, I realize that my body can only change if I want it to. If I stop shooting T, most things will return to normal. Having my ex visit me this weekend put a lot of things in perspective. She doesn't think I've "found" myself yet, and wishes I would. I'm thinking of moving to DC to work and leaving NYC for awhile. Moving to certain cities has been vetoed by my friends, but I think DC would be a nice change. Things are still expensive, but I'll be able to drive again and meet people who aren't always busy.

Thoughts are running away. Will write later.